Parent Help Live
Do you ever have things just not go the way you planned? This is a rhetorical question, I realize. However, it seems to be the theme for my family this week.
In fact, even as I am learning to “blog” from the PHL site, I painstakingly wrote out a solution oriented way to deal with stress then pressed “save and publish” and where is the lovely article? Oh – it went to “never-never land” – of course! Does my memory serve me well enough to bring forth all that I wrote? Not so much....
Bear with me as I piece together a “Cliff’s Note” version that I have learned to now put in Microsoft word before posting so I won’t do that again!
My husband and daughter were dealing with strep and I received a “viral version” of a horrible cold this last week. We were wiped out and many of our “to do’s” had to be let go. Research has consistently shown that prolonged stress creates a weakened immune system among other health problems. Families are also dealing with the increasingly prevalent HINI virus this season and how to avoid contracting this as well as other flu bugs. In addition to health, I just read a study from The Families & Work Institute (http://familiesandwork.org/site/newsroom/releases/healthreportrelease.html)that shows the recession is taking a terrible toll on workers—1 in 3 is showing signs of depression, 1 in 4 smoke, and most don’t exercise or take enough vacation time. So with all of this going on and it’s only October, what is a family to do?
1. Create regular routines: Try to instill healthy habits as a preventative as much as possible. My family was a bit lax these last few weeks on hand washing and eating well. I’ve now packed my purse with wipes, the car with antibacterial hand lotion and I’m doling out vitamins at breakfast and dinner. Regular bedtimes (even for adults) are extremely important. This also means no media (television or computer) at least an hour before bed to help the mind move more quickly into a restful state. Note to self – no checking e-mail after 9pm!
2. Exercise: I just started a regular exercise routine six months ago and noticed greater energy and coping skills! However, when the family is sick, this is one of the first things to go. Many of us avoid a workout when we believe it must be at least an hour of sweat inducing movement and then we don’t find the time. Try to set a schedule of at least getting some fresh air and walking around the block a few times a week. It’s easier to build on previously existing habits!
3. Eating habits: Our family does fairly well with eating a balanced meal when it’s home cooked. However, when the family is sick, home cooking can also go out the door. If ordering take-out or dining out, ask the waiter for a side of veggies – more restaurants and fast food restaurants are starting to make this accommodation. Offer smoothies or functional beverage juices packed with antioxidants and nutrients in the morning. Steer clear of energy drinks which are loaded with sugar and will send you crashing in a few hours and make it difficult for the body to build a strong immune system.
4. Create some balance: Today’s society tends to idolize those that can “do it all” – but at what cost? Realistically, doing it all means that it can’t all be done well. This is where I see many parents (myself included) become overwhelmed by the self-imposed expectations. What helps me is to view it from my children’s perspective. Do I want my children to view adulthood as a long list of “to do’s”? Do I want them to view adults as “grouchy, frazzled or begrudgingly doing work away from the family?” If you can’t create some down time every day for yourself and for your family, at minimum pick one day a week where you won’t do the dishes, laundry, check e-mail, etc. This quality time is to fuel your relationships with significant others and with yourself.
5. Ask for help: Call up a friend or ask your significant other to pick up the groceries. You may need to ask a colleague to take on that project or pass on volunteering for that program at school. There is only so much time in a day and by saying “no” to something, it allows you to say “yes” to something more important. Check in regularly with your feelings. This is your life and you get to choose how you want to create it! Parent Help Live can also offer professional support for parents on their schedule – whether it’s through online classes or through more personal connections over the phone. This professional support can offer parents a different perspective and better equip a parent with different choices and resources.
